The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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