Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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