so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
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well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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