i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
