Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize