I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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