my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
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He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
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He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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