fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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