great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
