You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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