He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
