the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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