I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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