One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
