I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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