All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize