how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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