Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
