The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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