We won't sleep together?
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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