worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize