How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
