So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize