So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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