HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
