I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize