I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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