just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
