Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
