The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize