I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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