I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i just google imaged poop.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
