not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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