if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
