Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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