hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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