go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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