so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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