Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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