Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Randomize
