It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
