Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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