My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
