Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
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tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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