She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
