..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
