let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
