Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I am midnight drunk by noon
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
