We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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