i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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