Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize