Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
